Dorothy has been in the dumps a bit lately. A lot going on, you all know the music. What is a woman to do?

“Darling, am I the bad one?” She asks me.

“What do you mean, Dorothy dear?” I kindly reply. It sounds like a wonderful philosophical debate is coming on.

“Between me and you, are you the good one and me the baddie ?” She rephrases her question.

I have to pause for a moment to think. In my opinion, we’re all a mixture of everything. There is no black and white. Good people do bad things, and the bad ones have a heart too. Who’s to judge ?

Yet some people, it must be said, have a knack of ignoring the rules of life and then trying to make the truth bend and fit their own needs. It doesn’t really work like this, folks. This is where deep-rooted unhappiness stems from.

How are we to define who’s good and who’s bad ?

7 Deadly Sins List & Meanings

  1. Envy = the desire to have an item or experience that someone else possesses
  2. Gluttony = excessive ongoing consumption of food or drink. Eating too much.
  3. Greed or Avarice = an excessive pursuit of material possessions
  4. Lust = an uncontrollable passion or longing, especially for sexual desires. Wanting to sleep around.
  5. Pride = excessive view of one’s self without regard to others. Being snobbish and boastful.
  6. Sloth = excessive laziness or the failure to act and utilize one’s talents. Being lazy.
  7. Wrath = uncontrollable feelings of anger and hate towards another person. Getting very angry.

These traits of character give place for scolding and punishment. Even today, when we’re not all that religious or into Christianity anymore. We use gossip as a means to convey which behaviours are acceptable and which are not.

Yet if we were truly charitable at heart, we would move beyond this condemnation and try to understand what moves people in their more regrettable moments.

How to reach out your hand towards the 7 deadly sinners.

  1. Envy = stems from feelings of being incomplete and inadequate, as if someone else has a lesson to teach us. Instead help this person to understand what is truly missing from his/ her life. Be kind !
  2. Gluttony = this person is starving for love. Show this person safety and emotional connection. His/ her excess in weight is symbolic for a background of emotional undernourishment. A healthy lifestyle fits the bill.
  3. Greed or Avarice = this person feels neglected and vulnerable and desperate. Learn to be charitable.
  4. Lust = this person is feeling lonely. Show him/ her acceptance and encourage him/ her to express what they truly wish to get out of sex. Teach this person self-control and how to redirect passionate energy for the higher good of all.
  5. Pride = boastfulness stems from feelings of being invisible. Convince this person that they are not as terrible as they think they are themselves, and instead encourage this person to be proud for his/ her real accomplishments.
  6. Sloth = this person fears humiliation and mockery. Show them that they should fear more to accomplish absolutely nothing in life, rather than fear failing at trying to do something.
  7. Wrath = comes from fear and anxiety. Patiently approach this person with understanding about their fears and fragility.

Sins come in the shape of unmet needs. We need someone open to our hurts and fears, someone to give and receive our affection. Someone to love us just as we are.

The Seven Virtues

“You did that on purpose, didn’t you?” Dorothy looks at me wounded. She has a tendency to take everything too personal when she’s upset. It triggers her paranoia. It’s a vicious circle of suspecting there’s a conspiracy where everyone is ganging up on her.

“I don’t know what you mean,” I’m waiting for it now.

“You deliberately mentioned the 7 deadly sins because of the baby’s father.” Dorothy snaps at me.

“Oh really Dorothy, I’m not such a social media lurker like you are. But now you mention it, which role did he play again?” I ask her amused.

“He was lust.” Dorothy is angry now.

“Was he?” I’m teasing her just for the fun of it. “Or were you secretly popping my love capsules?”

“I can’t remember,” Dorothy lies and hurries off to make tea in the kitchen. Everything always feels better after a cup of tea.

What do you think ? Was it love or was it lust for Dorothy ? Let me know in the comments below.

* Disclaimer : I can safely say that yes, that’s him : the South American guy who fathered my third baby, and then disappeared into nature. I’ve been told it’s a cultural thing and all a matter of upbringing. In any case, if you know this guy, just know what values he holds.

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