Sometimes I purposefully, though unconsciously, cut myself off from my business and workflow so I can avoid dealing with painful issues.
“You could record live webinars in your kitchen and show people how to do it,” I tell Bakerman as we are brainstorming business ideas again. “Sell your recipes. Or maybe you want the quiet life by the sea.”
“Sex on the beach,” Bakerman teases back. I can tell immediately he’s in a funny mood.
“Haha yes that too,” I laugh back. “I’ve never had sex on the beach. I’m 42 for crying out loud. Wouldn’t that be lovely…”
“You don’t need sand in soft places,” Bakerman always knows how to sooth my hurts of lost opportunities.
“No it probably sounds better than it really is,” I decide. It’s like people who claim they were up all night making love. Never done that one either.
“Did you have a good holiday?” Bakerman turns the subject to something more fun.
“Yessss,” I emphasize as I beam at him. “Love my kids sea beach and champagne.”
“No side entertainment?” Bakerman is making sure I was on best behavior.
“No,” I snap back at him and squint my eyes. “Like what?”
“Cava,” Bakerman offers.
“Champagne,” I correct him again. “And a few smokes.”
“Nice,” Bakerman smiles pleased. “Did Wim miss you?”
“Yes,” I smile again. “A bit. Did you?”
“Yes. It was very quite while you were away,” Bakerman admits.
I let out a loud laugh as Bakerman gets to his feet. “Got to go. Be good,” he says as he pecks me fondly on the cheek.
“That company came back to me that I was too expensive,” I tell him on his way out. “Any way I can still win the deal?”
I guess we all experience periods where we are separated from the abundant ebb and flow, be it in business or in our career. These times of being disconnected from a steady source of income may occur for many reasons, but self-sabotage is the most common cause for me cutting myself off from the abundant flow of the universe. I find I cut myself off from this flow so I can avoid dealing with painful issues, shun the necessary steps for growth, or prevent the success I am afraid of achieving from ever happening. When I disconnect from the abundant source, I am blocking the flow of the universe’s generosity. I become like a sleepwalker who is not fully awake to life, and my hopes, plans and dreams begin to appear as distant blurs on a faraway horizon. Universal support has obviously never left me. If only I can remember that I became disconnected from the abundant source by choice, then I can choose to reconnect.