When your goals are realistically and clearly defined, your life flows smoothly. First write down each goal you want to accomplish, be specific and set a deadline for each one. Second, the energy flows where your attention goes, so pay attention daily to working towards each one of your goals. And third, even small and simple actions daily can bring focus on each goal to bring your life back into harmonious and healthy flow. The result is that you will start to feel more confident, energized, and peaceful.
“Everything is signed!” I cheer when the Mentalist answers my call after the fifth ringtone late that evening. “Marriage contract, custody for Willem and agreement for the house. Now we just need to sell the other house. Yieks. And woohoo. Do you want to hear my list of 10 goals?”
“Yes I do,” the Mentalist answers pleasantly.
I start reading out each item on my list to him.
- I weigh 55kg by September 1st and by Halloween 2018 I weigh 52kg.
- I do yoga every day now and by Halloween 2018 I run 5km.
- I earn 25k per month by Halloween 2018, 30k per month by Christmas 2018 and 35k per month by my birthday 2019.
- I live in a beautiful big house near the school by Christmas 2018 and I have sold the house in Baal at a big profit for 550k by mid August 2018.
- I am a digital psychologist by Halloween 2018 and I am much in demand. By 2019 my daily rate is now 750 EUR.
- I have a partnership in my business by February 2019 and business is booming.
- I am planning a trip to South America with my kids by Easter 2019.
- I am creating a lucrative new business by January 2019.
- I am quitting smoking for good by January 2019.
- I have written a best seller by summer 2019 and living off royalties.
I pause to note a moment of solemn silence, “Don’t laugh, it is very personal.”
“Not laughing,” the Mentalist finally answers taking it all in. “At least your goals are clear. Need some more work to define some of them but this is good.”
“Okay,” I am relieved that the Mentalist approves of my goals. “I read them every morning and try to find something I can do each day to work towards each goal.”
“Ok good,” the Mentalist encourages me.
“Read that in my ‘Eat that Frog’ book about procrastination,” I tell him where the idea came from to make a list and be specific. “The other book I am reading about persuasion and influence is recommended by my digital psychology course. Robert Cialdini, must be someone well known.”
“I guess so in his world,” the Mentalist answers conveying disinterest in this much cited author. “You will be too. How long is this course?”
“45 hours,” I answer realizing that is not a lot at all. Then what am I taking so much time over, I wonder. “Will take me some time.”
“45 hours?” the Mentalist exclaims.
“I think yes in total course material but without your own study and research,” I precise realizing why I am taking much longer to get through the classes and the recommended extra study material. “I did a lot of extra reading yesterday. I am taking it slow because I want to do it right.”
“You said it’s free,” the Mentalist points out.
“Not this one,” I correct him. It’s the Udacity courses which are free. Some of them are good, but some others are rather a waste of time.
“How much does it cost?” the Mentalist wants to know.
“I am doing other free courses too: startups and intro psychology,” I inform him about the Udacity courses I am still looking into. “I paid for the digital psychology course. 700 USD. A lot of money.”
“Is there lots of stuff about websites and coding or just why people do what they do?” the Mentalist is really curious about what I am filling my head with lately.
“About how we can use marketing psychology and persuasion principles on websites to increase engagement and conversion,” I explain to him. “It will help in all areas of my job. For my Adwords and Facebook clients.”
“Sounds fantastic,” the Mentalist beams.
“To better understand my digital analyses,” I go on recounting all benefits for taking this course at the CXL Institute.
“It’s a good move Batman,” the Mentalist laughs.
“And to support my AB testing,” I conclude, hereby covering all the different aspects of what I do and how this course in digital psychology will help me address all those items. “I think so too. This feels good and right. Just like the house.”
“This is what I meant by evolving,” the Mentalist points out to me wisely.
“Now to sell my old house. That worries me,” I admit. “I do hope I evolve into something good.”
“Try to remember your old house is not a bank account with huge credit,” the Mentalist coaches me. “It’s value is as much as a buyer wants to pay.”
“I know that,” I retort, but doubt that immediately. “What do you mean? We’re ready to negotiate. Put it on the market at a higher price so we can go down a little. People expect to bid lower.”
“Yes they do,” the Mentalist confirms. There is always a gap between the price you are willing to sell at and the price at which a buyer is willing to purchase. If you want to make a deal, you have to meet each other somewhere half way.
“So it’s correct how I positioned the house?” I need him to reassure me.
“I guess so,” the Mentalist evades my question. “You will see by the response. But be patient. It’s silly season now. After the holidays you will get a better response.”
“Aaah yes that’s what Wim said too,” I remember.
In the deepest sense, goals function as windows to the soul. In fact, goals reflect your deepest desires. Each goal, each desire, like a window, allows a particular view and perception of some part of your physical, psychological and emotional life. Imagine, for example, that one window is clear, another is cracked and distorted, and yet another fogged over. Just as the condition of the windows of your home affect your view of your neighbourhood, so too do your goals need to be clear and in measurable in order to give you the best experience of life.
How much do you want to pay?