Go for it

Friends may be fully supportive of what you want, but it is up to you to go for it.

“Good morning,” I smile as I answer my phone. “Mid august came and went. Need to revise my goals and get serious about them. Losing weight and being active are not really goals but habits. It’s been too hot to run. But no more excuses now. Increasing my income and selling this house need more attention. What should I be doing more of? And what should I stop doing? Focus focus focus.”

“Hi,” the Mentalist answers dryly.

“How are you?” I ask him remembering my manners.

“How about stop repeating the same things over and over,” the Mentalist retorts. “Rather take responsibility for what you are really doing. I am fine thanks and you?”

“That doesn’t make sense,” I am puzzled at his fuzzy reply. “Doing the same thing or saying the same thing? And what am I really doing? Like… what did you say? I am good. Kids coming home tonight. What have you been up to lately?”

“Yes it does,” the Mentalist emphasizes. “You constantly say the same things related to your goals. Yet you refuse to make the changes necessary. Very weird. It’s more like seeking attention and sympathy then a real quest.”

“Oh right,” I sigh. I am annoyed at his response but decide to swallow it and find out what I can learn. “Which changes should I make? Like what can I change to increase my income?”

“Read Daniel Goldman’s books on emotional intelligence,” the Mentalist advises. “If you have to ask these questions then you are missing the basics. Either fix that through your kids or just be happy to be a worker ant and leave it at that. What do you need to change your income is easy. Learn a new skill everyone wants that is related to your core business and sell it. Stop looking for others to wipe you nose.”

“I am learning about digital psychology,” I point out haughtily. “Thanks for the book tip. Will order it and read it when I have finished all the other books I am reading.”

“Ok. In the meantime be patient,” the Mentalist tells me. “Do your homework and network.”

“Yes,” I smile because that is something I can do. Network and study, that is. Patience is a skill I have yet to learn.

“Where can I see you house advert?” the Mentalist enquires.

“Ah let me find it for you. It’s through an agency,” I tell him as I search for the ad on my iPhone and send him the link. “What do you think? Curious… someone else from the past asking me for collaboration partnership”

“The advert is good,” the Mentalist answers after a moment of silence. “I think you should ask questions of this person. Why does he or she want to collaborate.”

“Because they need somebody who speaks Dutch and is an expert in digital analytics,” I reply too sure of myself. “It’s Michael who used to work with Peter and me years ago. I saw him back at a digital event last year. The last time I networked since Wim was ill. And I networked first time again in June. More events coming up in September.”

“See what type of deal he is offering?” the Mentalist wants specifics.

“For the moment just projects then we will see if we can and want to work together again,” I answer but am not feeling as confident about my own statement.

“Hurry up,” the Mentalist coaxes me. “I need a job as a scrum master.”

“Haha,” I laugh. “You know I like it slow.”

“Indeed,” the Mentalist answers. And I wonder. Successful people make decisions quickly and change them slowly. Whilst unsuccessful people are slow at making decisions and change them quickly and often.

“Yes and then I complain things aren’t moving,” I answer as I realize I want to be successful too and will need to work on making firm decisions and sticking by them.

“Michael you know,” the Mentalist seems to think this is a great idea and hasn’t picked up on my own misgivings. “So there is some credibility there.”

“True,” I answer still unsure.

“Don’t be naughty,” the Mentalist tells me off. “Keep it business only please.”

“Oh yes definitely,” I exclaim surprised he keeps bringing this up. “Michael isn’t sexy. And I have Wim.”

“That’s good,” the Mentalist seems pleased with my replies. “Then you will succeed.”

“I will,” I repeat as my own personal mantra.

To my surprise, the Mentalist calls me back the same evening. I like it when we speak several times a day. It allows me to check in on all that is important to me.

“Do you have a good day today,” the Mentalist says with a strange twist of grammar. “Kids back and all rosy?”

“They will be back later on,” I repeat what I told him that same morning. He must be a bit forgetful in his old age.

“Are you making dinner?” the Mentalist offers a great idea.

“My day was good. Worked. Did more business. Also worked a bit on the house,” I inform him of what I have been up to. “I am out for a bite to eat with Willem and the au-pair.”

“Did you go look at Joti’s place yet?” the Mentalist suddenly pipes up. “Have you clipped your au-pair wings yet?”

“No I haven’t been to Joti’s place and never will,” I hiss annoyed he keeps bringing this up. But realize he might want my firm resolve to never go there. Strange. “I keep having to set the au-pair straight.”

“I understand,” the Mentalist answers in guise of seeking more information from me.

“Very hard work,” I sigh. “She is clueless. Poor time management. No food sense. But she is lovely and wants to work. So not all bad.”

“Yes she is from a wealthy family I think, or a poor one,” the Mentalist thinks out loud. “She lacks responsibility.”

“Yes,” I agree. “Not sure what their status is.”

“Teach her,” the Mentalist encourages me.

“Huge house,” I tell him what I remember from our Skype interviews.

“A wealthy,” the Mentalist concludes.

“Her father works or worked for the police,” I tell him the bit I know about her background. “I am teaching her. She is lovely. But she talks like my mother.”

“Spank her bottom but not too hard as you might damage her sensitivity,” the Mentalist replies cheekily. “Have a lovely evening. My battery is dying. See you tomorrow.”

We blow each other kisses and go about our normal daily doings.

All the signs seem to be pointing me in a particular direction. My thoughts and dreams are echoed in the songs and stories I hear and the media I see. In fact, this is just selective observation. But nonetheless, the message I am getting doesn’t even make sense, but somewhere inside, it just feels right. I am moving to the nearby village although my life where I am is just fine. And I feel the desire to pursue a new direction in my career which never really interested me before. From my point of understanding, my intuition is sending me directives to become my best and most fulfilled self. I am open and listening to the advice from the Mentalist. The next step is to take action and go for it.

Namasté,

Fiona

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