What lights you up?

“Good morning,” I smile down the phone on my daily morning call during rush hour getting to Brussels office.

“Hi Fiona,” the Mentalist greets me back. “How are you?”

“Great! First day back at work,” I am happy to report. I love time off at home with my little darlings, but also like getting dressed up and heading off to the office to tackle some serious digital stuff. “Had a wonderful week off. Got up early today and did yoga. I am ready for it. Signing for the house tomorrow. Reading W. Watkinson on the law of attraction, the original book that the secret based itself on. Very interesting.”

“Any response to our blog?” the Mentalist wants to know.

“I see now what you mean about that course with Deepak Chopra, when he tells you to take the road of least resistance,” I ponder back to past conversations we have had on this topic. “He is turning people into mindless sheep.”

“Indeed,” the Mentalist confirms.

“People are liking and reading our blog but not responding yet,” I point out to my frustration.

“Ok,” the Mentalist concludes. “I will try and write some more and send it to you.”

“Also, on some aspects, after reading Watkinson, I do agree with the secret and less so with Kevin Hogan,” I go on summarizing my own thoughts of the past few days. A little cryptic, I must admit. “You are fantastic!”

“Kevin is strong on manipulation,” the Mentalist clears the issues I am facing with the several sources of information I am taking in. “Watkins on is better for overall ideas.”

“You know I made a Facebook page for my house,” I continue onto the next subject. “Quite some likes on that but not much response yet. A lot of Arab likes too, which is strange.” I pause for a moment as I notice the resemblance between the two cases. Getting likes seems to be easy. Getting people to respond is an entire different story.

Atkinson is the name, sorry got that wrong,” I suddenly correct both him and myself. “Yeah Kevin is really good, only I prefer to read him. Have tried watching some of his videos on Facebook but I can’t. It switches me off. Can’t listen to the guy.”

“I understand,” the Mentalist answers mysteriously. “I will share with you 28 blogs on attraction made easy.”

“For our Mordecai blog?” I ask him in doubt of what he really means. “Or blogs I should read about attraction?”

“For our blog,” the Mentalist settles the question.

“In any case Atkinson also talks about the importance of emotions,” I now go on talking about the resemblances between Atkinson’s work and what can be found in the oversimplified book of The Secret. “How fear and worry are counterproductive.”

“I will write some stuff to get interest I hope,” the Mentalist continues on our own subject which is rightfully more important to us right now.

“I thought you didn’t want to give solutions on our blog?” I jump right back onto the subject at heart here. “But great idea! This is going to work. It just needs time to build momentum. We have only just started after all.”

“I am not familiar with Atkinson’s book,” the Mentalist brushes me off. “Only Atkinson I know writes about Autism. I won’t give solutions. Just a taste to make them curious and how to apply it.”

“No this guy is from 1800 something,” I am really into the subject and not quite ready to let it go. “A mental scientist. William Walker Atkinson. He wrote a lot of stuff besides the Law of Attraction. Also occult stuff.”

“I see,” the Mentalist replies getting an instant idea of who and what I am so indulged in reading.

“Then Esther Hicks stole from his ideas when she wrote the Law of Attraction which she said had been dictated to her by spirits,” I remind him of the plot line again and how these con artists became stinking rich with the idea. “And then The Secret was produced, also based on Napoleon Hill’s work.”

“Smoke and mirrors,” the Mentalist points out how con artists actually manage to maintain success.

“Thing is there is truth in all this work,” I tell him adamantly. These people are not entirely con artists. For all I know they might be very genuine in their undertaking. It’s just that the material is so sensitive and open for interpretation. Just like the subject of Happiness, I am yet to find a good interpretation of the Law of Attraction. “Yes a lot of bull but truth too.”

“Yes there is,” the Mentalist concedes as he can hear that this subject is quite important to me.

“I want to focus on the stuff that works,” I tell him fiercely. Then I sulk and add: “Dani is avoiding me…”

“I will send you the first rule to make yourself/ them attractive. This will help me too,” the Mentalist reassures me to proceed with our project. “Give him space. He might think we are a conspiracy.”

“He might. I realized that,” I give voice to my gut feelings.

“Give him space,” the Mentalist says softly.

“I will,” I agree.

On my way back from work that evening I call the Mentalist back with some happy good news: “Yay just talked to Dani. Man he looks bad.”

“Tell me what you felt please,” the Mentalist urges me.

“What I felt?” I ask him bewildered. “Honestly?”

“Yes when talking to him,” the Mentalist replies gruffly. “No please lie to me.”

“Dark, depressed, disgusted, boring,” I sum up tapping into my feelings. “But I was also happy and surprised and haply and optimistic.”

“Please elaborate,” the Mentalist pushes me further.

“Is that accurate enough?” I ask him to make sure this is what he wants to hear. “His physique is not taken care of. He doesn’t look in the camera when talking, looks like he got his eyes closed. He’s going on and on about administration but Europe isn’t an option either. He feels useless everywhere and doesn’t know what to do.”

“Does he lack purpose?” the Mentalist offers me part of the conclusion and the answer at the same time.

“I felt like putting him in a bath, get a shave and comb his hair,” I tell him outraged.

“Yes I understand,” the Mentalist susses my high-pitched emotions.

“Yes I would say he lacks purpose and passion and interest,” I decide resolutely.

“What did your instincts tell you?” the Mentalist pushes me further.

“Let’s get off the phone and do something fun and interesting instead,” I blurt out what I was feeling towards the end of my call with Dani.

“Ok,” the Mentalist seems happy with that response. “Did you feel as though he had taken energy from you?”

“No but he could easily if I get too sucked in,” I remark double checking my energy levels.

“Ok,” the Mentalist sounds relieved. “Don’t get sucked in. He has to learn to find solutions instead of complaining.”

“He seemed happy about talking to you, Doctor,” I tease him. “Yes he complains terribly.”

“Yes I am good at motivation,” the Mentalist says with certain pride.

“I agreed to talk to him again on Sunday,” I inform him of my plans. “Yes you are pretty good.”

“Ok,” the Mentalist continues. “I might have an idea where we can use him, help him and earn some money. Still thinking about it. Might Aldo give you an opportunity to go there paid by a sponsor.”

“Haha well I am all ears,” I cheer as my interest has definitely peaked instantly. “As long as we really help Dani in the process too.”

“We will,” the Mentalist concedes.

“Super duper,” I cheer still eager to hear yet another one of the Mentalist’s ideas.

“What gossip do you have today?” he suddenly throws at me. Such a nosey biddy body from time to time.

“Not much,” I sigh shrugging my shoulders in the process. “Back in the office after a week off.”

“No one doing crazy things?” the Mentalist asks me cautiously. He knows something. Or he has a feeling something is heading my way.

“Working nicely,” I go on ignoring the foreboding feeling that is creeping up on me. “No nothing crazy. I need to get cracking on the move.”

“Did your Russian friend get fired for being an A hole?” the Mentalist goes on to the next issue that had bothered me recently.

“Not yet,” I reply mal at ease. “I would feel very bad if he did.”

“I understand,” the Mentalist answers. “How is Wim healing?”

“Slowly,” I admit quietly. “He needs to build up strength. He tries to hide it, but I know he gas more healing to do”

“Has treatment stopped now or is he still on chemotherapy?” the Mentalist requests further details.

“No chemo ended end July,” I precise. “His scan in August was all clear. Second scan in December.”

“That’s very cool,” the Mentalist is happy to hear that the love of my life is healing in good health. “I hope he make a full recovery.”

“Me too,” I smile meekly. “He is a wonderful man.”

“I am going to try and write some stuff for you soon,” the Mentalist reminds me. “Maybe a short snooze first though.”

“Yes good,” I encourage him. “Ideas come when you rest the mind. Just a crazy idea, but how passive aggressive do you think my young Russian friend would be? My boss has been sitting next to me all morning. Never known him to just sit at his desk like that… Or am I paranoid? No I am not. This is funny. Or maybe I really look good.”

“Maybe you look good,” the Mentalist decides on the explanation which makes most sense.

“I think so too,” I smile as I smooth my shirt over admiring my newly won-back figure.

When you are lit up from the inside, you give your best to those around you and contribute to the world in meaningful ways. What warms your soul from the inside out, so much so that you can’t help but spread the joy? I want to ask you just that. Prepare to be inspired by my stories as you consider your own answer to the question: What lights you up?

In love & light,

Fiona

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